wave of light

International Pregnancy & Infant Loss Remembrance Day is observed today, October 15th.

As part of this, Wave of Light takes place at 7pm, where candles are lit to honor and remember all the babies that have left us too soon and are now amongst the stars.

For us, lighting a candle was the very first tradition we had with Zade. Each night, we would light one to honor him, feeling his warmth and presence by our side. It became a quiet, comforting way to stay connected to him. Over time this tradition, evolved into many more traditions, include Zade’s Christmas Drive.

Recently, I watched a video where a mother, grieving the loss of her daughter, shared something that really resonated with me. She said “I’m not able to emotionally process things at the moment, so I’m really trying to action things for my daughter”.

There are times when life takes over, and I catch myself feeling like I’m not doing enough for Zade. It’s a hard feeling to carry – the guilt, the longing to do more, to properly process my grief. Over the years, grief has changed for me, showing up in different ways, through different emotions and triggers. For me, the biggest challenge has always been the brain fog. When I feel it, I know that my grief is especially weighing on me. This is the hardest time for me to process things.

That mother’s message reminded me to return to the basics. To honor Zade the way we began doing so – by lighting a candle every single night. Sometimes, the simplest action is the most meaningful.

I hope that each of you will take the time to light a candle tonight for Wave of Light. It’s a beautiful tribute to the precious souls who are now amongst the stars, shining upon us.