HOW TO BRING UP ZADE IN CONVERSATION
I’ve had people ask me how they can bring up Zade in conversation.
And to tell you the truth, I’m still figuring it out. To lose a child that nobody else met or really knew, well of course that makes it much more difficult to talk about. But always remember, that I knew Zade from the day he started growing in my body, till the day I gave birth, held him in my arms and said goodbye. I knew him with all my heart, and I’d love to talk about him.
So don’t be afraid to bring Zade up. I understand that it might feel awkward, or you may think you’d hurt me in some way by talking about Zade. Trust me, it won’t hurt me. It would mean everything to me. Every moment of parenthood for us has been unconventional, and the way we choose to remember and honor him will be unconventional too. It’s up to us to decide how to do it.
A huge reason for starting this blog was my way of honoring and remembering Zade. My unconventional way of being a mom. For having a safe space where loved ones can also be a part of our journey. So everytime you comment on a post, or message me, or tell me you love to read the blog - well these are ways that you’re also cherishing Zade’s memories. Ways that you are being an aunt or uncle to him. Unconventional, well yes, but a beautiful way of making him a part of our lives.
Friend: “Azra, should we do something in Zade’s honor today?”
Me: “Yes!! I'd love that. What did you have in mind?”
Friend: “Hmm…”
Friend: “How about a walk in the park and then a big fat donut? 🍩”
Me: “Sounds perfect!”
A walk in the park followed by donuts - why you ask? Because if Zade were here, I would have been taking him for tons of walks in the park. So why not do it anyways? And boy did he love donuts. The amount of donuts I ate throughout my pregnancy is just insane. Mmmm I’m drooling thinking about the perfect chocolate donut - a classic.
More examples of ways to bring up Zade in conversation:
“Azra! I saw something orange today and immediately thought of Zade!”
“How are you doing Azra?”
“Tell me about Zade, I’d love to hear about him”
“I know today must be extra difficult for you, but just know that I too am thinking of Zade”
“Azra, should we do something in Zade’s honor today”
“Let’s grab bubble tea and cheers to Zade”
“Azra, I’m hosting an event. I'd like to honor Zade in some way. What are your thoughts?”
From the bottom of my heart, thank you for being here with me, thank you for supporting me, thank you for cherishing Zade’s memory, thank you for being open to being unconventional!
